“I’ve lost my fire during the pandemic. How do I recover?”

Kaye Olivar

August 19, 2021

For many of us, it has probably been a year of making difficult and uncomfortable adjustments. We have been forced to change the way we live, and we have been trying our best to cope.

I’m sure that many of us are having a hard time adjusting to our situation. While others can just tough it out, others are overwhelmed with fear, insecurities, and frustrations.

I can’t imagine how difficult it is for you to wait for your third year in college so you can start doing your on-the-job training. But because of the pandemic, you’re stuck at home, forced to just watch a webinar as if it will replace the OJT you’ve been dreaming of. Frustrating, right? 

Because of the many negative things we experience everyday, it sometimes seems that the best response is to escape from our difficult reality and to numb ourselves from any mental and emotional stress. 

We distract ourselves with “just one more episode,” entertain ourselves with “just one more game,” or kill our time with “just a few more minutes” of scrolling through vlogs, online shopping, or games. Others immerse themselves in passion projects or bury themselves in loads of schoolwork in a bid to stay productive instead of sulking.

These things are not wrong. Taking care of our mental health is definitely necessary, and staying productive is indeed so much better than sulking while doing nothing at all. But these things are mere placebo and can never address the dryness of our soul caused by the pandemic.

Sometimes, in our desire to drown out our pains and discomforts through work and recreation, something else fades into the background—our relationship with God.

Suddenly, you find yourself no longer craving God’s word. You don’t pray to Him as much, and you don’t find joy anymore in meeting with your Christian friends online. Even though there’s a constant urge inside you to read your Bible and spend time with God, there’s not enough desire to do things the way you used to. You have somehow lost that rhythm of having a thriving and intimate relationship with Him. 

The good news is that even as we struggle with our loss of passion, God’s passion for us has never waned nor wavered. 

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end.

Lamentations 3:22

Right now as you are reading this, God is calling you back to walk with Him again. He wants to speak to you through His word. He wants to heal the pain you’ve been trying to cover.

“But where do I start?” You might ask. 

How do we go back to actively walking with God? How do we fan the flame that has died out?

It starts with a decision to go back to God. Unless you resolve to say, “Lord, you’re all I want,” and decide to make the necessary adjustments, you will never be able to get out of that ditch.

In John 15:11–32, the prodigal son found himself in a similar situation. After running away from home and living a promiscuous life, he suddenly lost everything and resorted to eating pods for the pigs so he could live. But things changed when he recognized his desperate situation and decided to go back to his father.

I don’t know how deep you think you’ve fallen or how far you’ve gone away. God is just a prayer away. Let His still, small voice lead you back to Him. It may start by having that long overdue conversation with God and opening your Bible again.

Don’t go through life alone. Open up about your struggles and challenges to someone who can help you go back to your rhythm with God. This could be a trusted friend in church, your pastor or leader, or your parents.

Worship God again. Even if you don’t feel like worshiping, worship anyway. Open that Spotify playlist or listen to that song that you used to listen to when you were still a baby Christian. Worshiping God makes our heart tender towards Him and renews our love for Him.

True joy can only be found in God’s presence. As Psalm 16:11 says, “You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever.”

We can find greater pleasure and genuine peace in God’s presence than in the things that only offer momentary distractions or superficial relief.

If you’ve read this far, I want to encourage you to message someone who can help lead you back into the rhythm of God’s grace.

Remember, His mercies are new every morning and you can start walking with Him again today.




The Author

Kaye Olivar

Kaye is an incoming Campus Missionary from Every Nation Campus Bataan. She’s an ENFP who loves to do random things, write, call her dog just to tease him, or read a good book. When she’s not serving the students in the campus, she’s by her window, painting book covers, just for fun.